So simple even a caveman can do it
By Paul Baltutis
There is a popular commercial that depicts cavemen living amongst us, speaking perfect English and wearing modern-day clothing. The joke is that the modern-day cavemen are offended by being characterized as simple-minded.
The fact is that actual cavemen wore animal furs, held clubs and probably grunted more than they spoke. Their lifestyle was active and rigorous, and as result they were lean and muscular.
Would we ever want to go back to a caveman-type existence? Probably not. But, getting back to their physique, they had rather impressive arms, abs and leg muscles, didn’t they? Perhaps a few simple caveman-type workouts may just put us back in form.
Caveman workout: chasing
The premise. Cavemen run toward and encircle a herd of antelope. They chase them until some of the weaker antelope separate from the herd. The cavemen surround the stray and run it to exhaustion. After the brief encounter with the antelope, they finish off their prey. There is a great feast and celebration afterward.
What you can do: Since this kind of chasing was a group activity, find a local 5K or fun run in your “village.” Run at your own pace, all the while realizing that all will be rewarded when they’re done. Sure enough, there are food and beverages at the finish and a big celebration. This clearly strikes a chord with our caveman counterparts.
Writer Bernd Heinrich in his book Why We Run expressed this about the correlation between the ancient and the modern. “When fifty thousand people line up to do a marathon race, or two dozen high schoolers toe the line for a cross country race, they are enacting a symbolic communal hunt, to be first at the kill or at least take part in it.”
Caveman workout: being chased
The premise. A caveman is gathering wood and runs into a grizzly bear or a mountain lion, or another caveman from an unfriendly tribe. His hopes he wasn’t detected and then tries to discreetly put distance between himself and the threat. Once in the clear, he runs quickly to the safety of his tribe or to his “cave.” If he were seen at any time the situation becomes much more urgent, and only the swiftest and most cunning would survive the ensuing chase.
What you can do.
You have to be a little creative on this one. You could go out to the mountains or to a wilderness area and hope to “run” into something scary. This isn’t very practical, and we don’t want to be responsible for your friends or family’s reading about your “caveman workout” in the paper.
A more practical application would be to stage a “prediction run.” A group of runners would remove their watches and handicap their start times based on a time prediction over that distance. Everyone would have equal chance of winning, there would be a race within a race, and everyone, except for the fastest runner who takes off last, would feel like he or she is being chased. The winner is the one who came closest to his or her predicted time. At the end all the runners would celebrate in a similar fashion to a standard race.
So, if you are looking for a reason to exercise, or if you want to add a little excitement to you’re your running, think and act like a caveman. Such an idea may just be the missing link to great fun and fitness for modern-day runners like you and me.
Paul Baltutis is the manager of Soler’s Sports in Alamo Heights in San Antonio. He is a certified marathon coach for Team in Training. He can be reached at sage_run03@yahoo.com.
